Archive for Personal
December 3, 2008 at 8:00 pm · Filed under Personal
The stars are the most beautiful reminder of your location in the world. My combat boots trudging against the desert terrain were the platforms upon which my eyes witnessed heaven. Stars shone so bright I was forced to squint to distinguish between the dense clusters. Cool desert winds find a way of creeping into your nose with each gaping breath.
Just hours later my eyes gaze from the billows above Capitol City and am met with a similar proposition. The lights of domicile speckled across the blackness prompt memories of a day before. Thoughts drifting to the world below gazing up at me, disappointing as they must be at this night sky. Do they realize they look just like brilliant celestial bodies of yesterday? The night sky guided countless souls across vast expanses of oceans. As I journey through the vast expanses of life those same stars guide my course. Even from high above, soaring in the heavens, the stars find their way to my thoughts.
November 29, 2008 at 3:40 am · Filed under Personal, Techie
Tonight I was placing in my calendar the fact that a friend of mine is traveling to New Zealand when I noticed the little red squiggly informing me that I spelled the country incorrectly. Needless to say I expect such things, to the point of phonetically spelling just to make sure spell check gets it. Thats right, rather than learning to spell I learned howto give the computer little clues. It has become my game and enjoyment in life. I attempt to see just how wretched I can spell a word and still have the computer read my mind. Needless to say I don’t get out much. Go screw your persp…a…paci…us perspicacious jerk face. Take that!
Back to the tale at hand, New Zealand. There I was placing it correctly on the calendar entry when the squiggly appeard. I do what any sane horrible speller would do. Went to google and typed it in there. Low and behold the spelling in my head was correct (whats up now Bruce?) and the computer was wrong. By golly I just about broke into River Dance before putting the kebosh on that just long enough to write this post. So how is that Firefox 3 on MacOSX 10.5 thinks New Zealand should actually be New Sealant? It is an Island so maybe they do need some Sealant. Frankly I have no clue what to do with myself at this point. My computer has never lead me astray (except for that search for “I want to become a ninja turtle” which turned out to be a total waste of time.)
To be safe though, from this point forward I am going to assume my laptop is correct and the world is wrong. Why? Because the sight of red squigglies drives me bonkers. So Alexa, have a great time in New Sealant.
November 28, 2008 at 10:51 am · Filed under Personal
The past few weeks my read of choice before bed is The Prince, by Niccolò Machiavelli. While the book speaks volumes to the monarchy of yesteryear, the implications for a “Prince” like myself are astronomical. The book has had a direct impact on my leadership outlook and helped me to better understand roles. Forgot the cheese and focus on a classic.
The book is a chapter-by-chapter breakdown on leadership principles for Princes of the post-Roman empire. Machiavelli does a wonderful job showcasing both sides of a coin. For example Machiavelli correctly points out that a leader must strike a balance between cruelty and mercy. A leader cannot be totally loved and respected and likewise cannot be totally hated and respected. This same chapter discusses the implications of the people loving or hating you and assassination. A very inclusive chapter.
As with all principles it is important to take them in small doses. A modern day leader can lean upon the ideals portrayed but not engulf them. My teams would certainly be opposed to my hanging them to deal with disgruntled employees. Or maybe I am just a weak modern leader, a good hanging never hurt anyone.
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November 25, 2008 at 7:14 pm · Filed under Personal
Or in other words I am shortsighted. I watched outside the CRJ700 as Tucson appeared. Flying into Tucson I was surprised they had finally finished the renovations of the airport and how I felt. Being the blogging type I figured it a safe bet that I had posted something as I left…sure enough…
Sometimes when we leave a place we know it isn’t forever. Yet you still look around with deep breath and soak it in. What is “it” that we need to soak?I had that feeling today as I boarded in Tucson. I knew that I might be back but this time would be the last of this era. This was the last of a time in my life, a period of great testing. I felt this one other time in Shreveport so I know it well. The same yearn for one last look. One last breath. One last freeze frame of all the people in the room. Some people mistake this feeling by associating it with a place. They misunderstand that the place is little more than a collection of people and emotions. The scenery is picture worthy, but it is the person looking at it with you that will cement your love of it. There are many more places for me to go. I look forward to bottling that moment up and placing it on my shelf of life. Take that last deep breath and seal it tightly for this is all you will have of this moment, this place, this time.
I was both right and wrong with this. The emotions were certainly different than those garnered when I left, but the person was the same. My argument centered around the period of life and “Nick” I was then. Truth of the matter is I am no different now than a year ago when I posted that paragraph. Sure the scenery has changed and the locale is moving, but the guy who types this typed that. Curiously I would ask my friends and readers, am I the same?
Possibly the greatest disservice we perform is assuming that being unchanged is an inferior state. In a society that relishes the future and ignores the past we can never allow ourselves to accept stationary. We simply save those eras for the rocking chair on our porch and AARP cards. The good old days only count when the days have been spent to hastily.
So back in Tucson, here I am. Some changed, some not. Honestly, I am okay with it either way
November 22, 2008 at 9:05 pm · Filed under Personal
My Father always taught me that there are things in life worth waiting for and working hard towards. For better or worse I took that lesson to heart and ingrained it upon my psyche as standard issue. In my whirlwind of my mind I have justified the sacrifices as the eventual beauty of what will come. So this letter is to my future, well my future whatever it is. Future wife, future child, future dog for all I know.
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26 Nov, 2020
To my loved ones,
I delivered this letter to you upon awakening for a new day. Surprising it must be to receive a letter from me despite me being here with you. It is important to know that I am writing this letter perched upon a ball chair (don’t ask) after making a big decision. The decision itself isn’t monumental as the ones we have in our lives now, but the ideal of what I am doing is.
The years of my life before your smile graced my mind were shared with a little dog. You may have seen pictures as he was a dear friend. States held little meaning as we traveled from zip code to zip code. I gave up much during these years. What spurred this letter was deciding to go to the desert. Packing up my bags and heading out west to make sure my team could be home for Thanksgiving. It is unfathomable to imagine the kind of joy you brought to my life and that idyllic quality is what put my clothes in the suitcase. This will be trip number 35 for the year and I wanted to let you know why I am home with you now…
I spent countless hours soaring above the clouds so that we could spend countless hours staring up at them now. My possessions were always second hand to make sure that your hands never begged for things you needed in life. The days I earned for vacation were saved so that I never missed your first goal on the soccer field. Every little decision was made with gratification and our delight in reason.
This Thanksgiving I am taking one for the team, taking one for you. One day this will all make sense and you will understand why I grin with such a lustrous smile. While you were asleep I was thinking back to the night I wrote this letter, alone with my little dog in the big Capitol, and I now realize. It was all worth it.
Nick, Dad, Husband, Father, Friend…whoever’s hands this eventually finds
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